Quotes from the movie Donnie Darko by Richard Kelly (2001) with Jake Gyllenhaal, Jena Malone, and Mary McDonnell.
– Can I squeeze one out?
– Not till eighth grade.
You’re not a bitch. You’re bitching, but you’re not a bitch.
28 days, six hours, 42 minutes, 12 seconds. That is when the world will end.
– Hi, Cherita.
– Shut up.
– Donnie Darko, perhaps with your recent brush with mass destruction you can give us your opinion.
– Well, they say when they flood the house and tear it to shreds that destruction is a form of creation, so the fact that they burn the money is ironic. They just want to see what happens when they tear the world apart. They wanna change things.
– Where do I sit?
– Sit next to the boy you think is the cutest.
We’re not supposed to tell anyone what nobody knows?
– I made a new friend.
– Real or imaginary?
– Imaginary.
– What did Frank say?
– He said to follow him.
– Follow him where?
– Into the future.
My name is Jim Cunningham. Welcome to “Controlling Fear.”
– My mum had to get a restraining order against my stepdad. He has emotional problems.
– Me too. What kind does he have?
– He stabbed my mum four times in the chest.
– Donnie Darko? What the hell kind of name is that? It’s like some sort of superhero.
– What makes you think I’m not?
– For Physics, Monnitoff wants me to write this essay. Greatest invention ever to benefit mankind.
– If it’s Monnitoff, that’s easy. Antiseptics. The whole sanitation thing. Joseph Lister, 1895. Before antiseptics there was no sanitation. Especially in medicine.
– You mean soap?
– You’re weird.
– Sorry.
– No, that was a compliment.
– Smurfette fucks the other smurfs. Why did Papa Smurf make her?
Because all the other smurfs were getting too horny.
Not Vanity. I heard he was a homosexual.
OK, she fucks them while Vanity watches. OK?
What about Papa Smurf? He must get in on the action.
Yeah. When he does, he films the gangbang.
Later on, he beats off to the tape.
– First of all, Papa Smurf didn’t create Smurfette. Gargamel did.
She was sent in as Gargamel’s evil spy, to destroy the smurf village.
But the overwhelming goodness of the smurf way of life transformed her.
And as for the whole gangbang scenario, it just couldn’t happen.
Smurfs are asexual. They don’t even have reproductive organs under those little white pants.
That’s what’s so illogical, you know, about being a smurf.
What’s the point of living if you don’t have a dick?
– Dammit, Donnie, why you gotta get so smart on us?
– How old is Grandma Death?
– 101.
– She does the same thing every day. Just walks back and forth, back and forth to the mailbox. And nothing ever in there.
Dr Cole, not only am I a teacher, but I am also a parent of a Middlesex child. Therefore, I am the only person here who transcends the parent-teacher bridge.
“Duh” is a product of fear.
– You can’t lump things into two categories.
– The lifeline is divided that way.
– Well, life isn’t that simple. Who cares if Ling Ling returns the wallet and keeps the money? It has nothing to do with either fear or love.
– Fear and love are the deepest of human emotions.
– OK. But you’re not listening to me. There are other things that need to be taken into account here. Like the whole spectrum of human emotion. You can’t lump everything into two categories and deny everything else.
He asked me to forcibly insert the lifeline exercise card into my anus.
– Dr Monnitoff?
– Donnie.
– Um, I know this is gonna sound kinda weird, but uh…
do you know anything about time travel?
– Ah! A wormhole with an Einstein-Rosen bridge, which is theoretically a wormhole in space controlled by man. So, according to Hawking, a wormhole may be able to provide a short cut for jumping between two distant regions of space time. So in order to travel back in time, you have to have a big spaceship that can travel faster than light. Theoretically. And be able to find a wormhole. The basic principles of time travel are there. You’ve got your vessel and your portal, and your vessel can be just about anything. Probably a spacecraft.
– Like a DeLorean.
– Any metal craft.
– I love that movie, the way they shot it. It’s so… like futuristic, you know.
– Donnie, what did Roberta Sparrow say to you?
– She said every living creature on earth dies alone.
– How did that make you feel?
– It reminded me of my dog Callie. She died when I was eight and she crawled underneath the porch.
– To die?
– To be alone.
– The search for God is absurd?
– It is if everyone dies alone.
What if you could go back in time and take all the pain and darkness and replace it with something better?
– Do you wanna kiss me?
– Uh… I… Sorry… Donnie, wait. I just… I just want it to be at a time when it
– When what?
– When it reminds me… just…
– When it reminds you how beautiful the world can be?
– Yeah. And right now there’s some fat guy over there staring at us.
Bonnie’s aggressive behaviour, his increased detachment from reality, seem to stem from his inability to cope with the forces in the world that he perceives to be threatening.
– Has he ever told you about his friend Frank?
– Frank?
– The giant bunny rabbit.
Donnie is experiencing what is commonly called a daylight hallucination. This is a common occurrence among paranoid schizophrenics.
Entirely too many young men and women today are completely paralysed by their fears.
They surrender their bodies to the temptation and destruction
of drugs, alcohol and premarital sex.
How much are they paying you to be here?
– Are you telling us this so we buy your book? It’s the worst advice I heard.
– You see how sad this is?
– Want your sister to lose weight? Tell her to get off the couch and exercise. No-one knows what to do when they grow up. It takes a while to find that out. Right, Jim? And you. Yeah, you. You sick of some jerk shoving your head down the toilet? Maybe you should lift weights or take a karate lesson. Next time he tries to do it, you kick him in the balls.
– Do you see this? This is an anger prisoner. A textbook example.
– It breaks my heart to say this, but I believe you are a very troubled and confused young man. I believe, you were searching for the answers in the wrong places.
– You’re right, actually. I am pretty troubled and pretty confused. And I’m afraid. Really afraid. Really afraid. But I think you’re the fucking Antichrist.
– Each vessel travels along a vector through space time, along its centre of gravity.
– Like a spear?
– I beg your pardon?
– A spear coming out of your chest.
– Um… sure, yeah. And in order for the vessel to travel through time,
it’s got to find a portal, in this case a wormhole…
– Could these portals just appear anywhere, any time?
– I think that’s highly unlikely. What you’re talking about is an act of God.
– If God controls time, then all time’s pre-decided.
– I’m not following you.
– Every living thing has a set path. And if you could see your path or channel,
you could see into the future. Like… a form of time travel.
– You’re contradicting yourself, Donnie.
– If we were able to see our destinies manifest themselves visually, then we would be given a choice to betray our chosen destinies. The fact that this choice exists would make all pre-formed destiny come to an end.
– Not if you travel within God’s channel.
– Um… I’m not going to be able to continue this conversation.
Why?
– I could lose my job.
– So we call them IMGs.
– Infant Memory Generators.
– So you buy the glasses for an infant and they wear them when they sleep. But inside the glasses are these slide photographs, and each one is of something peaceful or beautiful, whatever the parents want to put inside.
– What effect would this have on an infant?
– Well, nobody remembers their infancy. Anyone who says they do is lying.
We think this’ll develop memory earlier in life.
– Did you consider that darkness is part of infants’ natural development?
– Why do you wear that stupid bunny suit?
– Why are you wearing that stupid man’s suit?
– I’m sure you’re aware of the horrible allegations against Jim Cunningham.
– I know, I saw it on TV. Something about a kiddie porn…
– Oh, please! Don’t use those words! It’s obviously a conspiracy to destroy an innocent man.
Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
– What’s “cellar door”?
– This famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language, of all the endless combinations of words in all of history, that “cellar door” is the most beautiful.
I promise that one day everything’s gonna be better for you.
– The sky is going to open up.
– If the sky were to suddenly open up, there would be no law.
There would be no rule.
There would only be you and your memories.
The choices you’ve made and the people you’ve touched.
If this world were to end, there would only be you and him. And no-one else.
I guess some people are just born with tragedy in their blood.
– Deus ex machina.
– What did you say?
Dear Roberta Sparrow,
I’ve reached you in your book and there’s so many things I need to ask you.
Sometimes I’m afraid of what you might tell me. Sometimes I’m afraid you’ll tell me this is not a work of fiction.
I can only hope the answers will come to me in my sleep.
I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief because there will be so much to look forward to.
♪ All around me are familiar faces
♪ Worn-out places
♪ Worn-out faces
♪ Bright and early for the daily races
♪ Going nowhere
♪ Going nowhere
♪ And their tears are filling up their glasses
♪ No expression
♪ No expression
♪ Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrow
♪ No tomorrow
♪ No tomorrow
♪ And I find it kind of funny
♪ I find it kind of sad
♪ The dreams in which I’m dying
♪ Are the best I’ve ever had
♪ I find it hard to tell you
♪ I find it hard to take
♪ When people run in circles
♪ It’s a very, very
♪ Mad world
♪ Mad world
♪ Children waiting for the day they feel good
♪ Happy birthday
♪ Happy birthday
♪ Made to feel the way that every child should
♪ Sit and listen
♪ Sit and listen
♪ Went to school and I was very nervous
♪ No-one knew me
♪ No-one knew me
♪ Hello, teacher, tell me what’s my lesson
♪ Look right through me
♪ Look right through me
♪ And I find it kind of funny
♪ I find it kind of sad
♪ The dreams in which I’m dying
♪ Are the best I’ve ever had
♪ I find it hard to tell you
♪ I find it hard to take
♪ When people run in circles
♪ It’s a very, very
♪ Mad world
♪ Mad world
♪ Enlarging your world
♪ Mad world ♪
– What’s going on?
– Horrible accident. My neighbour… got killed.
– What happened?
– Got smooshed by a jet engine.
– What was his name?
– Donnie. Donnie Darko.
– Hmm.
– I feel bad for his family.
– Yeah.
– Did you know him?
– No.